Author: andichorley

Walking with Compassion

.Reading time 7 minutes.

Hello all! It is cold here in Oklahoma. Oklahoma doesn’t usually get to -7. I hope all of you are staying nice and warm. This unusual weather that we are experiencing has me thinking a lot about those that are out in this weather. I am not talking about the linemen, the ranchers or the first responders. I am talking about the roughly 4000 homeless that are in Oklahoma. The ones that have to rely on places like the Homeless Alliance. I am also talking about some of the 750,000 elderly. Many of whom have no one to go get them supplies. I am also thinking about the 168,000 single parents that are solely responsible for keeping their children warm and fed. Currently, 594,140 people in Oklahoma struggle with hunger. 208,110 of those are children. If you think you are a Disciple of Jesus and none of this is your problem, you are wrong.

            “Him who strengthens me.”

If we take a minute to look at the Disciples and the lives that they lived, we see people who were shepherds. Jesus and his disciples fed thousands and thousands of people in the span of just three years. If I made my family a meal 3 times a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year for 3 years, for the 5 of us that would be 16,380 meals. We look at the number of people the Disciples fed, and we are in awe of their selflessness and the miracles of being able to feed that many people. But… How often do we grumble at even having to make dinner a few nights a week for our husbands and children? I don’t say this to shame you. Believe that I am the first to raise my hand and say that I have grumbled. I have grumbled a lot. In my grumbling my husband has shown me grace. My husband who goes to work five days a week for 12-15 hours every day in all weather, shows me grace in my grumbling. The word tells me:

She rises while it is yet night
and provides food for her household
and portions for her maidens.

Lord continue to change me. Continue to change my mind. Continue to change my heart.

“Him who strengthens me”

In Mark 6:30-44 we read about the Disciples feeding 5000 men. The word tells us that Jesus saw a great crowd and had compassion on them because they were like sheep without a shepherd.  The disciples came to Jesus when it got late and told him to send them off to buy themselves something to eat. Jesus response was, “You give them something to eat”. The word does not tell us if these men had the ability to fend for themselves. It does say that the Disciples were going to tell them to buy food for themselves. If I were an assuming woman, I might assume that they may have had the ability to acquire food. Regardless, Jesus said, “You give them something to eat”. If we look further into Mark, Mark 8:1-10, we see once again that Jesus had compassion on the crowd. This time he had spent some time with these men and did not want to send them home hungry for fear of them fainting. So, he said, “feed them in this desolate place”.

When we look at the Greek of this word compassion we find the word “splagchnizomai”. Splagchnizomai: to be moved in the inward parts, to feel compassion – “from splanxna, ‘the inward parts,’ especially the nobler entrails – the heart, lungs, liver, and kidneys. These gradually came to denote the seat of the affections.

Deep down in his inner most being he was moved to care for people. He modeled this for his Disciples. We know that this was successfully modeled for his disciples because we see the Disciples follow this example in Acts 6. The Disciples were informed of a need and they appointed people to fill the need.

            My life has not been easy, but I have survived. I have not always had all I wanted but by still being alive, I have had all I needed. I was reminded of Paul’s words to the Philippians.

            I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.

I have recently asked myself a couple questions and I encourage you to ask yourself these questions.

Do I praise his name when I am brought low? Do I praise his name when I abound? When I am given plenty and I have abundance, am I showing compassion and generosity to others that have hunger and need? This hunger and need could be spiritual or physical. When I have hunger and need, do I seek that which gives what I need? Do I truly walk as a Disciple?

“Him who strengthens me.”

Remember that compassion and generosity is not meant to make you feel better. It is meant to make others feel better. It pleases the Lord. “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” I pray you find your hands useful.

”She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy.”

As Always,

Grace & Peace

-Chorley

Qorban

.Reading time 9 minutes.

Note: This is an old post that I had originally posted in November on another site. After hearing someone speak the other day, I felt it would be good to share again. Old things are still useful.

Qorban:  An offering brought near the Alter

Korban: An offering dedicated to God and misused by the Jews as a way to evade their rightful duty to God to care for aged parents or other responsibilities.

1The LORD called Moses and spoke to him from the tent of meeting, saying, 2“Speak to the people of Israel and say to them, When any one of you brings an offering to the LORD, you shall bring your offering of livestock from the herd or from the flock.

3“If his offering is a burnt offering from the herd, he shall offer a male without blemish. He shall bring it to the entrance of the tent of meeting, that he may be accepted before the LORD. 4He shall lay his hand on the head of the burnt offering, and it shall be accepted for him to make atonement for him.                Leviticus 1:1-4

First let’s note that this book was wrote to the people of Israel. Those who chose to believe and follow God. If that applies to you, this text is for you. The word used here for offering in Leviticus is Qorban. The entire book of Leviticus has to deal with offerings, sacrifices and atonement. It has to do with the “ Holy” things. The word “Holy” is used 87 times in the book of Leviticus. The Hebrew word for “holy” used in Leviticus, qodesh, means “that which is set apart and marked off; that which is different; separateness; apartness; sacredness.” If this reminds you that Ephesians 1 tells us that the Lord chose us in him to be Holy and Blameless in his sight, give yourself a fist bump. So, now lets jump forward to Matthew 27…

     3Then when Judas, his betrayer, saw that Jesus was condemned, he changed his mind and brought back the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and the elders, 4saying, “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood.” They said, “What is that to us? See to it yourself.” 5And throwing down the pieces of silver into the temple, he departed, and he went and hanged himself. 6But the chief priests, taking the pieces of silver, said, “It is not lawful to put them into the treasury, since it is blood money.” 7So they took counsel and bought with them the potter’s field as a burial place for strangers. 8Therefore that field has been called the Field of Blood to this day. 9Then was fulfilled what had been spoken by the prophet Jeremiah, saying, “And they took the thirty pieces of silver, the price of him on whom a price had been set by some of the sons of Israel, 10and they gave them for the potter’s field, as the Lord directed me.”       Matthew 27:3-10

The word used here for treasury is Korban or Corban. Judas had a huge awakening after he gave up Jesus for 30 pieces of silver. The 30 pieces of silver relates back to the old testament when you would have to pay someone 30 pieces of silver if your animal mauled someone’s slave. Mauled someone’s slave. Read that again. Mauled someone’s slave. Hmm. Everything in the Old testament is  useful. There is always a transition of words through the years. Spelling changes and often through territories, pronunciation alters. The word Korban was coming from the older Hebrew word Qorban. The Chief Priests knew that this money was not fit to be a gift because of what it had been used to buy. This money was what we would call “dirty”. Kinda sounds like unclean. Hmm. The only other time we see this word used in the new testament is in Mark 7.

 5And the Pharisees and the scribes asked him, “Why do your disciples not walk according to the tradition of the elders, but eat with defiled hands?” 6And he said to them, “Well did Isaiah prophesy of you hypocrites, as it is written,

“‘This people honors me with their lips,
but their heart is far from me;
7in vain do they worship me,
teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.’

8You leave the commandment of God and hold to the tradition of men.”9And he said to them, “You have a fine way of rejecting the commandment of God in order to establish your tradition! 10For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and your mother’; and, ‘Whoever reviles father or mother must surely die.’ 11But you say, ‘If a man tells his father or his mother, “Whatever you would have gained from me is Corban”’ (that is, given to God)12then you no longer permit him to do anything for his father or mother, 13thus making void the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And many such things you do.”   Mark 7:5-13

Here we see Jesus dig into the Pharisees and the scribes. He is calling them out for their clear hypocrisy. The Pharisees and scribes were known for telling their children to use “Corban” as an excuse to not offer things to their parents or others they were responsible to. Always claiming, I cannot give you that, it is for God. When the reality is that they just did not want to give it away. Their gifts to offering were not to give God something from their heart, it was to get out of helping other. The word here for Corban is again: Korban. So, in the New Testament we see Korban used two different ways. One: The Chief Priests admit the dirty money cant be Korban. Two: The Pharisees are called out for giving Korban not from the heart but out of selfishness and pride.  

How did we go from Qorban to Korban? How did we go from offering God something we care about, something without blemish, something acceptable to the Lord, something that we desire to give to the God we love… to offering him something he never wanted, something that may have innocent blood on it, something that we give out of selfishness or pride? I am not talking about the sin we walk away from. I am talking about the things we offer God. This is something different for everyone. Time, Money, Love, Marriage, Children. Etc.. What is the heart behind what we offer the Lord?  What is the heart behind the things we refuse to offer the Lord?

Is this mic on?

.Reading time 11 minutes.

Hello all. I hope this finds you well. By well, I mean spiritually healthy. It is funny to think about the fact that I could mean so many things by well. I could mean, your bills are paid. I could mean you are healthy physically. There are so many things that go on in our lives and be determined as well or unwell. The average English word apparently has at least 3 meanings. The word “set” has 430 meanings. If I were to ask you, “did you win the set?”, would you know what I am talking about? You would only know by asking questions. The average person can speak 125-175 words per minute. Amazingly, the average person can listen to 450 words per minute. Our ability to understand depends on our ability to listen. More than our ability… our desire. If we don’t have a desire to listen to others. There is no way that we are ever going to understand them.

            I have this deep desire, like most women, to be heard when I speak. When we speak to our spouse, we want them to hear us. When we correct our children, we want them to obey. When we share the Gospel, we want the hearer to believe. If there is one thing that I understand, it is not being heard.

I grew up in a house that had little want for the voice of a child. I remember my big brother sitting timidly next to our stepfather at the dinner table. We all knew if my brother made one wrong move he would be hit hard enough to be knocked out of his chair. Our stepfather worked nights and all four of us children knew that if we woke him, we would surely be whopped with his cowboy belt, that was intricately engraved with his name. When I joined the Army at 17, I spoke up all the time. I usually landed myself in some type of trouble for speaking my mind. Afterall, the Army could not break me down any further than my childhood. Someone yelling in my face was nothing. I guess I am a glutton for punishment.

I had to fight to be heard in the Army for a long time. It was not until I became a Non-Commission Officer that I was actually heard. Then I got moved to an all-male company. The fight was back on. It was not until after our first fire fight in Kadhimiya, Iraq that I no longer had to fight to be heard. I had gained the respect of the men. I had been with them for a short time. We were doing a standard escort mission. As soon as we went under a bridge one of my best friends started running back towards us and just barely got out of the way of an RPG that flew past us. We immediately followed the commands of our platoon sergeant and moved our individual squads into position. I took my squad to keep overwatch on one side of the bridge that we were receiving fire from, while the other squad leaders moved to their positions. We were under attack for a while. I saw a small fire under one of the trucks that we were escorting. I was worried because the day prior to this, we had to sweep the remains of a fellow Soldier out of a truck that burnt down. I explained to my squad that I needed them to cover me while I moved to the truck on foot. They were to maintain their position. One Soldier started to tell me that I should stay in the truck. I quickly had to inform him to shut up and follow orders. Believe that I was yelling over the gunfire and I did not say it in the nicest way. When I made it to the truck that was on fire… I quickly found out it was a small fire the civilians had made to keep warm while we handled the enemy for them. I put out the fire that was drawing attention to them and made my way back to my guys. As soon as I got there, I received a call from the platoon Sergeant that he needed me to call for fire. This the nice way of saying we were going to call for air support to drop a bomb on the building that we were receiving gunfire from. I began to wonder if the mic was working. The air support network had gone down in our truck. I had to make the call across the entire battalion network. There was a chance of up to 900 people hearing me call for fire. I was incredibly nervous and didn’t feel like I should be the one doing this. I immediately felt inferior. Then I told myself that my voice was needed more now than it had ever been needed. I had to speak up to help the lives of the 12 guys, 1 medic, and 5 civilians. I couldn’t sound weak because there were already too many who didn’t believe I should be serving with the infantry company to begin with. I mustered the guts and began my transmission.  I had one person try to interrupt me. I quickly told them to shut up and wait( I added some explicit words). At the time I didn’t know it was the Operations Sergeant Major. Our air support Arch Angel was unable to come due to air status being Red (too dangerous). So, we just continued the fight until the enemy gave up and ran away. Believe that those of us still alive, are alive because of the heroic actions of SSG Snapp and the squad leaders on the ground. When we returned to the small forward operating base, the Sergeant Major paid me a visit. He informed me that when things are important, always speak up. Fight to be heard. Then he had me do 50 push ups for cursing on the battalion network. My men never questioned me again. My words had weight in them.

I got to wondering about women in the Word who spoke up anyway. Women who spoke up when it was necessary. The women who stick out to me the most are Ruth, Deborah, and Esther.

Ruth spoke up to Naomi. Naomi had given up. Ruth listened to Naomi list off her woes. Ruth empathized with Naomi. Ruth helped give Naomi reprieve and an absolution to her loneliness. Ruth chapter 1

Deborah was the first and only female judge to reside over the people of Israel. Deborah was the one that was instructing Barak on how to handle the Canaanites. Deborah was the one that reminded Barak that the Lord had commanded him. Barak had doubt, it was Deborah’s voice and support that led him to defeat the enemy. Barak didn’t do this alone. His show of force led Sisera to flee to a woman for shelter. This woman Jael drove a tent peg through his head.  And verse 21 so eloquently says, “So he died” This course of events lead to the Canaanites defeat. Because Deborah spoke up. Judges chapter 4

Esther is one of the most well-known speakers in the word. She got her position in the only way that she could. She got the position of queen through her beauty. Her beauty may have been what got her to her position, but it was her selflessness that led her to risk her life and speak up for the Jews who were set to be killed by her husband’s friend. There is so much weight in her husband choosing her voice over his best friends. Choosing any woman’s voice over a mans was huge already. Lives were saved because Esther spoke up. Esther chapter 7.

You have a voice and your voice matters. Speak up for yourself and speak up for others. You may be met with opposition or you may be heard. Know when to speak up. Know when to stand up. Know when to walk away.

Whether you are a friend, a co-laborer, or a spouse… do you listen? Do you ask questions to clarify? When someone speaks do you listen to understand, or do you listen to respond? Is your response more important than what they are saying? Is your response apples of gold?

The Obligatory Season

.Reading time 8 minutes.
Photo by Daniela Constantini on Pexels.com

First off… let me tell you all that I love receiving your calls, texts, and emails. It really warms my heart to hear how you are spurred on, encouraged, and walking in freedom.

Every morning when I am getting ready I look out the window in my bathroom. I don’t look for any particular reason. I think it is probably just an old habit of checking my surroundings. This week when I looked out the window I was drawn to our huge pile of logs. This pile is about ten feet wide and five feet tall. The logs themselves are about 6-8 feet long. The entire pile has yet to be cut and split. The wood is still seasoning.

One of my favorite books in the Bible is Ecclesiastes. I know that many people see it as a doom and gloom book. However, it is known as one of the wisdom books. I think that is why I am drawn to it. When I know that I need to seek wisdom from the Lord, I often go to Ecclesiastes or Proverbs. I know that many of you have heard the phrase, “for everything there is a season”. Many times, that I have heard it from someone, it was because I was going through something hard and they had no other words of comfort. It has become something that sounds very patronizing, even if that is not the speakers intent. I want to give you some context of those words. While looking at the wood just laying there seemingly useless to me, I was reminded of this section from Ecclesiastes chapter 3.

1For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven; 2a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; 3a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; 4a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; 5a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; 6a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; 7a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; 8a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.

If you have never really dug into each of these lines of poetry, please do this! If you don’t know how, head over to the resources page and download the PDF. It is a free tool that is amazing! I don’t know how else to express my emotions for the word other than to say that it makes me weep. Over and over. I can’t read this word without weeping because I am reminded of so many things when I read these words. Everything that is born, must die. When we have this hope in Christ, death can look much different to us. It can look like peace for the sick. Reprieve for the wounded. That does not mean that the loss of a child or spouse does not hurt. It still hurts. It hurts something bad because it cuts deep and leaves a black hole that is too big for us to fill alone. Being planted somewhere is great for growth. However, being plucked can look rough at first… until the roots are allowed to settle into new space that allows more growth. I understand the time to kill must be followed by time to heal. Not healing after killing is one reason that we currently have over 22 veterans committing suicide every day in America. Every season of life that we go through has been ordained by our God.

My wood pile is seemingly useless. It is big and takes up space. It is not cut or split. I know if I had to use it, I could. I need to put more work into it for it to be its best.  It needs to season. It needs time. God does not always use us when we want to be used. He uses us when it is time for us to be used. Some seasons he has us work, some seasons he has us rest. We need to be vigilant in the word to know exactly what season of life he has us walking. Many times he has us go through a hard season to prepare us to do his work. Just as my wood has no knowledge of when I will toss it in the fire, you never know when the Lord will call you to action or when you find yourself in a fire. After all, the Lord calls us to be prepared in season and out of season. (2 Timothy 4:2)

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 is a list of antithetic parallels.  I am not going to lay all of these out for you. I think it would be a great exercise to go through this and think of how each of these seasons have been reflected in your life. Not everything will be literal. Remember: rabbinical people wrote the old testament. So, for those of you who have never killed anyone, consider a time that you hurt someone, or they hurt you. When a relationship was killed. When you think of casting stones, don’t assume that the word is referring to John 8:7, but rather 2 Kings 3:25. Really dig. Find the voice of the Lord in this text. You may find things you need to stop or start. I did.  

As always, feel free to reach out to me! All email subscribers will be entered in a drawing January 31st. The prize is a Sweater from Chorley’s Christian Clothing with a (TBD) amazing sublimation design! If you are not a subscriber, you can easily sign up on the main blog page or the home page.

Grace & Peace

Chorley

Daddy Issues

.Reading time 8 minutes.
Andi, Teresa, Daniel, Katrina -1989-

Life has been very reminiscent of childhood this past week. I have had many conversations that have led back to childhood pain specifically. I am not sure if that is the best wording for it, but I will use it anyway. When I say pain, I am referring to physical and emotional wounds that are caused usually by those that were put in place to protect us. I can say honestly that I have had to walk through many issues personally.

          I was reading from the book of Genesis this week. I am doing a read the bible in a year plan with a group of women. It is called wondered by the Word. It is nice. I don’t think I can get as deep as I usually do because it is just so much in such a short amount of time. So, I pick and choose what verses I will get really in depth with. This week I was reading through the story of Abraham, Ishmael, Hagar, Isaac, Sarah, Lot and his daughters. Oh the daddy issues!

          Okay, the first thing… Go read Genesis 16-22.

Now in this text there are so many things that would not be okay to us in 2021. One thing is Abraham having a child with his servant. In 2021 we would most likely see this as human trafficking. It wasn’t considered that when Abraham did it…it was different times. While it may have been different times, I honestly believe that this would have a negative impact emotionally, on many involved. The next thing is lots daughters sleeping with their dad while after their mother chose her past over them and God. Not to mention their dad has isolated his daughters from society. WHAT?! This is plain as day incest. The girls are also no doubt dealing with abandonment issues as well. The story goes on to talk about Abraham telling his servant Hagar and his child to go away and not come back. Hagar runs out of water and just places her child next to a tree to die. To Die. The Lord then speaks to her and saves her and her child. Then Abraham (following God’s commands) takes his son up the mountain to sacrifice his life. His Life.

In a few chapters we have read about so many things that could have lasting effects. I have lived through a lot of abuse in my life. I don’t say this for sympathy, I say it because sometimes experiencing something helps you understand it better. I think I understand abuse because I lived it and I overcame it. Well, I guess it is more honest to say that every day I choose to overcome it. Every day I make choices to make sure that the abuse is not passed to my children. I want this sin to stop with me.

I have found a few facts that I wanted to share with you guys:

  1. It’s estimated that at least 1 in 7 children in the US has experienced child abuse and/or neglect in the past year.
  2. Neglect is the most common form of child abuse, followed by physical abuse, sexual abuse, and psychological abuse.
  3. In 2018, about 16% of children who were abused experienced more than one kind of maltreatment.
  4. Boys and girls experience similar rates of childhood abuse (48.6% and 51% respectively).
  5. Rates of child abuse and neglect are 5 times higher for children in families with low socio-economic status compared to children in families with higher socio-economic status.
  6. Children younger than one year old are the most vulnerable to maltreatment, accounting for almost half of child fatalities from abuse in 2018.
  7. In 2018, 76% of child abuse perpetrators were a parent to their victim.
  8. In 2018, 62% of children placed in foster care were removed from their homes due to abusive neglect, totaling over 160,000 children.
  9. Children who experienced any form of violence in childhood have a 13% greater likelihood of not graduating from high school.
  10. Adult survivors of childhood abuse are more likely to experience mental health difficulties, including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, PTSD, eating disorders, and substance use disorders.
  11. Adult survivors of childhood abuse are more likely to engage in high-risk behaviors like smoking, alcohol and drug use, and unsafe sex. They’re also more likely to report overall lower health than those who haven’t experienced childhood abuse.

The source for this information can be found at:

 11 Facts About Child Abuse | DoSomething.org

I shared these facts with you for a couple reasons.

One is for those that have experienced abuse. You get to choose what your life looks like from here out. You get to crawl out of the deep pit of despair and chase the God who is your true father. The one who never leaves your side. The one that has gotten you through every battle. The one in the den that calms the lions. The one in the fire that stops the singe. Even when it seems like he is sleeping through the storm, he is still in the boat. You choose what you will pick up and carry. You choose what you will leave behind.

The other is for those who are walking with someone who has experienced abuse. This is the moment that you get to show someone else love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control. This is when you get to show someone Jesus. Choose your actions and your words very carefully. Remember that hurt people, hurt people.

My questions for you:  

Are you a hurt person, hurting people?   

Do you have anyone you need to forgive? How do you walk that out?

Do you need to ask anyone for forgiveness? How do you walk that out?

Are you walking with someone who needs extra grace? How do you walk that out?

Grace and Peace

-Chorley

Additional Resources

National Child Abuse Hotline: 24/7 at 1-800-422-4453

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 24/7 at 1-800-799−7233

National Sexual Assault Hotline: 24/7 at 1-800-656-4673

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 24/7 at 1-800-273-8255

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) Helpline: 24/7 at 1-800-622-4357

Crisis Text Line: 24/7 text DS to 741741

Fellow Believers vs. Spiritual Family

.Reading time 10 minutes.

Relationships are weird and complex and amazing all at the same time. We read in Genesis that man was not meant to live alone. (Gen 2:18) How do we look at this in a whole sphere kind of way? There are two parts to this. We can take this in two different directions at the same time. The first is that we are not meant to live apart from God. Walking with God daily is a choice. Walking with God daily is one of the most important things that we can do. The second part of this is walking with others. Adam was given Eve: a helper. I know some may say that she was not a helper, only a vessel of temptation and bad influence. The reality is that we have no clue if Adam would have made the same choice whether Eve was there or not. The Word never says, “If Eve hadn’t convinced Adam, He never would have…” We all have parts of us that are not Christ-like. Adam was not innocent in this world changing event.

I talk about relationships because I have witnessed two different types of relationships lately. They may seem like twins on the surface, but they have quite different DNA.

The first relationship that I see is the relationship between fellow believers. This is encompassing many types of relationships. I would even go so far as to lump “Church Family” in this group. Many of the people that fall into this group are amazing people. They love, they are kind, and they read the word. They are the ones that invite you to church. They bring you a meal when you are sick. There are also many that do not love, are not kind, and don’t read the word. They are still believers. They are the ones that have never met each other but debate scripture on social media. I consider this all to be lumped together as “fellow believers”. The thing that ties this group together is that while the relationship is good, it is good. While it is also disposable. It is the relationship that can be here today and gone in a month. We see many people sever ties when they leave a church. The relationships slowly or even as quickly as it takes to click unfriend, disappear. We see this type of relationship play out in Luke 4. ( please read Luke 4 :14-30) He had begun his ministry and when he returned to Nazareth. He went to the synagogue and read from Isaiah. He went to the people that had known him a boy. He went to the people that he had been raised near. He went to people that were fellow Jews. Fellow believers of the one true God. As soon as they did not agree with what he was doing or saying, the relationship was over.

The next type of relationship is Spiritual Family. While, like I said before, on the surface to looks like “church family”, it is not. This group is also loving, kind, and reads the word. The difference is in the hurt and the pillars This is the  group that has walked though hard things together and come out looking more like Christ. This is the group that has spent hours fighting for each other’s freedom. This is the group that has shared each other’s burdens. This is the relationship that I long for all of you to have. I have this.

In 2016, I witnessed this in Nashville, TN. One of the harder things in my life is being unequally yoked. I had made a hard confession of pain, sin and shame about this to a group of 26 people. While I had grown a good relationship with many of the women, not all of them. I had yet to grow a good relationship with most of the men. One of the men spoke up and read, What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. -James 4:1-3. Then he said, “Let’s ask now”. So, I dropped to my knees to pray, and then 26 people, many that I did not have a relationship with, also dropped to theirs. All of us began to petition the Lord for my husband. Powerful prayers and weeping. If anyone would have walked in they might have thought we were a cult ready to sacrifice someone. (HAHA) After these five men vowed to dedicate one day a week to praying and some fasting for my husband. They still do this. I occasionally get calls asking for specific struggles to pray about. This is “Spiritual Family”.

I have also witnessed this in telling a woman to give her unborn baby to God. She had many pregnancy complications and was told the baby might not survive. While this hurt my heart, I knew what the word said. I had the obligation to fight for her freedom in this. I had the obligation and authority from the Lord to tell her that everything in this life is his plan and his will. That even if her baby were to die, that it would only be by Christ’s design. She came to know that the Love of Christ might spare her child a life of hurt and pain. Then, the Lord changed everything around she delivered a healthy baby. As he was delivered, I did not watch him come out. Instead I watched her face as she was overwhelmed with absolution. A baby boy that joyfully now calls me “Grandma”. His joyful smile and laughter lights up a room and when I see him my heart is reminded of the Lord’s steadfast love for us. I am also reminded of his mother’s freedom that was gained through tears brought on by a balance of truth and grace. There were things that she did not agree with or want to hear. However, she humbled herself to the Lord. This is Spiritual Family.

While I am in a season of mission I will remain tethered to my Spiritual Family. While Christ is my anchor and the Word is my rutter, they are the ones who remain in the boat with me. Through every storm, they remain. They are my helpers as I am theirs. This is the type of relationship I wish for you. I only found this through the process of making Disciples of Christ. I am not saying that relationships with fellow believers are wrong, I am saying that there is just a difference. Relationships with fellow believers can turn into Spiritual Family. Remember also, that relationships with Spiritual family can be hard too. It is not perfect. The great example of this is found in Acts 15:36-41, when Paul and Barnabas separate. While they went separate ways in ministry, Paul still had great things to say about Barnabas from Prison. They were still Spiritual Family. In my opinion, it is because they had already gone through hurt and the Lord has already built pillars in them.

Spiritual Family is built through hurt and pillars of faith.

My questions for you…

Do you have Spiritual Family?

Do you have people have give you truth and grace and you do the same for them?

Do you have people that are willing to bruise their knees for you?

Are you willing to wash their feet?

How can you turn your relationship with fellow believers into Spiritual Family?

Grace & Peace

-Chorley

Don’t forget to subscribe if you want to be emailed new content and reach out if you have any questions!

Maturing Like Vanilla

.Reading time 7 minutes.

Hello again my dear friends.  I have been incredibly grateful for all of you that have subscribed to this blog. If you have not yet subscribed and would like to… please head over to the homepage, scroll to the bottom and type in your email in the provided box. I do not sell your email address, and this does not subscribe you to junk mail.

I enjoy learning new things all the time. I like to think of myself as a jack of all trades. If I do not know how to do something, I try to learn. I spent a long time not being able to do things that looked interesting or fun. Yesterday marks 1 year exactly since I had my Explant surgery. For those that don’t know what this is… it is a surgery to remove breast implants. Basically in 2013 I had implants put in because I did not have my identity in Christ. That is the easiest explanation of why. Starting in 2015, I got sick. I continued to get sicker and sicker every year. I had so many strange ailments that I seemed like a hypochondriac. I found out that my implants were slowly killing me.

Since having them removed I have continued to get better. I have gotten so much healthier and been able to do so much more with my life. I am definitely more present as a mom and wife. I have also been able to have some amazing conversations with other women who have been sick because of the same thing. Through the sickness and toxicity, I developed fibromyalgia. There is currently no cure. I have days that are great, and I have days that I am in bed. I praise the Lord for allowing me to have so many more good days now. So, on good days, I want to live a full life and learn new things.

This week I took on the adventure of making my own vanilla extract. There are so many different ways to make it. One way that I found involved an Instapot, vodka, and a bunch of vanilla beans. I started with a clear liquid and after 35 minutes of pressure cooking the vodka with the beans, I had a beautiful amber liquid. I have no clue how it tastes. I can not even try it for another month. Right now, it still smells very alcoholic. The smells let me know that it is not ready. I am excited to see how it matures in a month. This whole process reminded me of our spiritual maturity.

Spiritual maturity is something that we all need to perceive with reality. I first got a good grasp of this maturity from Jim Putman’s book Real Life Discipleship. Jim explains the different stages of spiritual maturity as: Dead, Infant, Child, Teenager, Adult, Parent. I have come to focus on just: Dead, Infant, Teenager, Adult, Parent. I focus on those because that is what my spiritual mother taught me. If you want a breakdown of the different stages of maturity, I strongly encourage you to read Jim’s book or get with a disciple maker! One thing I know for sure is that age does not equate spiritual maturity. The traditional way to make vanilla extract involves putting the beans in vodka and letting it ferment for at least three months while occasionally shaking the bottle up. My vanilla is now 1 day old. If you put my vanilla next to a bottle that was traditionally made and also 1 day old… you would find that they are vastly different. There has been special care put into my vanilla to help it mature quicker. One way is not better than the other. They are simply different processes. Just as I know 50 year old women that are still spiritual infants while I know 30 year old women that are spiritual parents. The parents have had special care put into them.

One thing that I am reminded of is 2 Corinthians 3:1-18. I really want to focus on verse 18.         

 And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.

This speaks into the fact that we are all being transformed over and over. While it is true that the process of making Disciples matures believers, it is also true that the maturing comes from the Lord. The Lord who is the Spirit. This maturing happens through abiding, reading the word, a solid prayer life, and making Jesus Lord of every aspect of your life. All of these things take time. They don’t happen overnight. We may reach spiritual maturity, but we will continue to move from glory to glory. By this I mean that there is glory in what we were, what we are, and what we are to become.

My questions for you…

Are you giving your spiritual life special care?

Are you using the right ingredients?

Are you rushing the maturing process?

There is too much in this verse for me to unpack it all in here. I encourage you to really study this verse and dig into unveiled face, beholding, transformed, and glory. Look into the Greek! What is the voice of the Lord for you in this verse? Don’t forget to check out the resource page on this site!

Grace & Peace

-Chorley

Sourdough

.Reading time 5 minutes.

This year about a week before thanksgiving, I started down the sourdough journey. I got the idea from another writer. I think her starter is passed down from 100+ years. Mine is not. I started my sourdough starter with flour and water and let it sit and ferment. I loyally fed it every day. The only thing I made for two weeks was a thin layer of hooch. I was disappointed and discouraged. Well, I loyally fed it unbleached all-purpose flour. After two weeks I did some more research and found out that when creating a sourdough starter from scratch, you need a flour with a higher gluten content. I decided to toss my jar of hooch and start over with whole wheat flour. After just 4 days, I had successfully created a sourdough starter. Now the thing with a sourdough starter is that you have to “feed” it every day. A certain amount of flour and a certain amount of water. You also discard some every day so that you don’t have a gallon of starter. If you aren’t going to use it frequently you can keep it in the fridge and feed it once a week or so. I have now shared some of my starter with my mother-in-law in California, a prophet in Harrah, a prophet in Choctaw and a shepherd in Choctaw.

When I handed over the starter I got to have good conversation with three of the four. Good Kingdom conversation. Sourdough has become a vehicle for ministry. Once conversation stuck out to me more than the others. The Shepherd from Choctaw. She is an amazing woman that, while we do not know each other well, we share a common grief. That grief binds our hearts together in a weird way.

She prayed for me at the end of our visit. Her prayers reminded me of so many things. I was reminded that iron sharpens iron. I was reminded that mundane visits can turn into moments to minister to others. I was reminded that we should not forsake the gathering. I was also reminded that walking with the Lord is a lot like making sourdough. You can not build from the wrong stuff. You need to be fed regularly. When left too long with out nourishment, there will be death. Death of prayer life, death of abide time, death of covenants, and death of spiritual growth. Death of spiritual growth will pour on to every other part of your life. Parts of our life need to be willingly discarded. In other words, Prune all branches that bear no fruit.

I was also reminded that one reason the Lord allows us to grow, is so that we can feed others. I have extra sourdough starter because I regularly feed it and nourish it. So, I am able to share with anyone who asks. If I want to be able to pour Jesus into other people, I have to first feed myself. You cannot pour from an empty cup. If you don’t know how to feed yourself the word, that’s okay. Everyone has to start somewhere. If you need some pointers, head over to the resources page and download the bible study PDF. If you need more help, reach out and I can help you find someone.

He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, “Do you love me?” and he said to him, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep.              John 21:17

Are you feeding yourself? Are you feeding others? Are you trying to pour from an empty cup?

To the Shepherd in Choctaw: “It is God to whom and with whom we travel, and while he is the end of our journey, he is also at every stopping place.” -Elisabeth Elliot

I pray this finds you well. Grace and Peace,

– Chorley

Deciding to Walk or Not

.Reading time 4 minutes.

            I have a few things to go over for those of you that have yet to decided if you want to go on the journey of becoming a disciple maker and for those of you who are trying to figure out who you would like to disciple. While reading a book by J. Oswald Sanders I was reminded of the three types of people that may say yes to being discipled. We learn about three types straight from Christ himself. In Luke 9: 57-62 we see Jesus walking down the road. He is talking with those walking with him and one man declares to Jesus that he will follow him wherever he will go. This man is “The Impulsive” and has not counted the cost of following Christ. Jesus reminds him that the son of man has no where to lay his head. Jesus gives him a quick check to reality. We can see many people get wrapped up in the charisma of following someone. This discipling business is not to be romanced. You have the real question of would you give up everything to follow Christ? Never say yes just to please or impress someone else. The next type of person that we see tell Jesus that he will follow him is “The Reluctant”. This man tells Jesus that he should first let him go bury his father. This is the one who wants to settle things first. He wants to essentially finish doing all he wants to do before he will follow the Lord. He wants to follow the Lord when it is more convenient for him. I can tell you, there will never be a convenient time to follow. The next one that tells Jesus he will follow him is “The Halfhearted”. This is the man that tells Jesus he should let him go back and say bye to his family. When we look at the surface of this request, it seems like the man just wants to kiss his wife and kids’ goodbye. What could be wrong with that? Its sweet right? Well, nothing in the word is surface deep. This man is half concerned with following the Lord and half concerned with what he has left behind. I am reminded of Lot’s wife when I think of this man. The Lord tells us that “no one who puts his hand to plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom”. When you consider following Christ…

  1. Have you counted the cost?
  2. Are you waiting for a convenient time?
  3. Is your heart torn between your old life and the possibility of a new life?

If you are looking for someone who modeled how deciding following Christ should look, I would suggest you reading through the story of how Elisha decided to follow Elijah. And listen to the popular song Burn the Ships. It is a nod to Cortez, who burnt his own ships when he arrived at the new world with hundreds of men. He made the visual statement that there is no turning back. If Discipling has taught me anything, it is that you will get tired. You will want to quit. You will die a thousand deaths. However, the Lord will grow you with each death. But first you have to make a decision on whether or not this is for you.

Children of the Lord

.Reading time 6 minutes.

What does it look like to raise your children up in the ways of the Lord? What does it mean that children are an inheritance from the Lord? I have been given the gift of youth. Not youth as in a youthful appearance or body. I have been given the gift of working with the youth of Harrah Church. They are a gift. This gift has opened my eyes to many things. When you look at the average Christian child:

-They are born into a family that goes to church every Sunday. The average parent drops their child off at the children’s ministry on their way to the “adult” service. The child typically spends his days in Sunday school being told all of the nice bible stories and how much Jesus loves him no matter what. That becomes the depth of many children’s relationship with Christ. Then their parents come along and often have them baptized at a young age as soon as the child says, they love Jesus. I am not here to judge anyone’s raising, just making an observation.

– Then the child becomes a teenager and is no longer stewing in innocence. The teen begins going to a “youth group” for most of their biblical learning. Most youth groups play a game every Wednesday night, sing some worship songs, then give a 15-minute sermon. I know this, because I grew up with this. There are very rarely hard teachings because we wouldn’t want our kids to get uncomfortable and quit coming. Our sermons are not long because we know they could never pay attention for longer than that. Most are never taught how to really read the Word. If any youth leader shows an interest in a teen, the situation is almost always presumed perverse. Thus, ending any type of intentional mentor relationship. The teen stays here for a few years until the age out of the church’s system. As soon as the child graduates, they are no longer part of any direct ministry.

At what point do parents take responsibility for their child learning about the Lord. Does the Word not say, “ “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”? We can not always expect everyone else to teach our children about the Lord. While I say this, I am also thankful for the workers. I have witnessed workers lead children to the miracles of Christ. I have watched these workers prepare children for the work of the saints. I have watched these workers remind children of the Lord’s Word so many times that the child is now reminded of the Word. While the workers are doing good work for the Lord, what are the parents doing? Are you taking every opportunity to pour Christ into your child? When St. Augustine was studying in Rome, he was an adulterer. He had a mistress with whom he had a child. He was following a Manichean theology of religion. His father showed him the pagan ways and his mother showed him the Catholic Christian ways. When he left their home at an early age, he was led astray by every kind of deceit. The few things his mother taught him, were trying to compete with the sin filled world. His mother Monica left their home in Africa and followed him through Rome. When he boarded a ship, she followed. When he got off, she followed. She stalked him like prey preaching to him over and over. He had to escape a ship that she had followed him onto to get away. It wasn’t long after this that St. Augustine fell ill and found a new mentor. A bishop. This bishop was able to show St. Augustin the truth and power in the Pauline letters. So, while his mother may not have been the one thing that pushed him towards salvation in Christ, her persistence in planting seeds in her son played a huge role in his salvation and his path to lead others to Christ.

What seeds are you planting in your child? Are you watering those seeds with the Word of the Lord?