I thought now would be a great time to interview some Disciple Making women. One thing that I know; is that Disciple making does not rest on just one person. It rests on the Lord and everyone doing their part. There is no ultimate Disciple maker on Earth. Just as I do not believe that there is an ultimate way to make disciples. I know how I make disciples and I know that it works for me. There are varying ways and as long as you are striving to imitate Christ in the method in which you are attempting to make disciples, who can say you are wrong.
Meeting with Jenny on a Friday morning is easier for me than some. She may live out in the middle of nowhere Oklahoma, but that nowhere is only 15 minutes from my home. This made the drive quick. When I pulled up to the Brockman’s new home, I was greeted by Jenny and four smiling boys covered in dirt. I don’t say this because they are dirty feral boys. I say this because Jenny is a mom that allows her boys to run around and get dirty and explore their 40 acre property. They have a couple cows, a couple dogs and couple kittens. After getting my three actually feral children on their way to fun town, I headed inside. Her floors were clean, and her laundry room doors were pulled shut just like mine would have been. I took my shoes off and headed to find a seat on the couch. Jenny talked about her dislike of her couches but all I could think about while she spoke was the memories and miracles that those couches had been through. The first night I met Jenny, I remember seeing those couches. I believe those couches came from Jenny’s mom or grandmother, but I don’t remember for sure. I remember from the story; they were perfect when they came. Those couches were present for Jenny to relax after her hysterectomy. They were a comforting place to sit while she mourned the loss of her mentor. They were present when Jenny laid her life down and helped women fight for freedom from things of this world that held them down. Those couches are where I sat and listened to David mourn for a family member that he wanted to help but didn’t know how and in the same breath tell me how he was praying for my husband. Those couches are well worn because the Lord saw fit to give Jenny and David the responsibility of raising four boys. Those couches are well worn because Jenny and David have been commissioned to have dozens of men and women sit in their home and cry out the things of the Lord. The prayers that have been prayed on those couches and the tears that have stained the fabric have been gifts from the Lord. We praise God for those well-worn couches.
So, here is how our chat went…
Andi: How do you think Discipleship has affected your family?
Jenny: I think it has only been good for my family. They have to give up their time too. But it also costs them something too. Every single week. The have to do extra cleaning share Mom and Dad two nights a week. But especially being in this house we are better. In the old house we would eat and close the doors and we would be completely shut off, so the kids could not really see what was going on. Here they eat their dinner at the bar, and they will have their own conversations over there. But usually when they are done, we will still be doing highs and lows at the table, and the boys will come around and prop themselves up on their knees over here and put their elbows in the windows over there (next to the table where all of Jenny’s women are sitting) and listen to us talk about what is good and what is bad and what the Lord is teaching us. It is good for them to get and see the importance of Discipleship and how everyone plays a role. They are learning stuff in the word they may have not otherwise. They are also learning from other people than Just us. From reliable people.
Andi: Out of all the people that have come into your home, besides you and David, who do you think has had the biggest impact on their (her kids) lives?
Jenny: Can I answer that in a different way? Or give you an answer to a slightly different question? The women and men that come into my house really love my kids. There are a few that take a special interest in my kids. There are people who Discipleship has brought into our home, but David didn’t necessarily disciple. They don’t owe us anything. Like… I feel like I owe Rachel something. She laid her life down for me. There are people around us like: Michael Farris, Dustin Hunt, Chris Moix, and Dan Dixon. When my kids are behaving in a way that is inconsistent with who they are, these men use every opportunity to pour into them. They remind them who they are. They give them the word; they give them homework and unconditional love. Probably two or three years ago, Chris taught Garett who he is. After washing him in the word, the voice of the Lord for Garett was that “ I am a man of integrity and I am a man who considers others before himself”. I was like, oh that’s cool. But then Chris actually did it. When he would see my son, he would say: “hey, who are you?” Even to this day Chris initiates conversations with Garett by saying, “Hey, who are you?”. And that longevity and that constant “you are making dumb choices, but your choices don’t define you, Jesus does” That constant reminder has made a giant impact on his life. When you love my kids well, you are loving me well.
Andi: Including Rachel, there were originally 9 women in our group. Some have since passed away or walked away from Disciple making. What does is say to you when you see people that were so invested in this, just walk away? Because we have been people in many groups that have walked away either during the process or after they have been released and commissioned. Not what does this say about them, but how does this impact you?
Jenny: It makes me sad. When you have done hard things with people… many hard things. When you share all the real things about yourself, there is a bond formed. It is crazy. I never had sisters. I have one brother. Now I have sisters. So, to have gained a bunch of sisters and to have lost some sisters, it is hard.
Andi: Do you think there is mourning phase that takes place when this happens or when someone breaks covenant?
Jenny: Yes.
Andi: How do you walk through that?
Jenny: The first few times I walked through it, it jacked up my identity. Whether it was from someone who walked away and made the choice that yea, I don’t want to do this after release or during the process. I default back into people pleasing and trying to earn it. But now I also think that the road is narrow, and few find it. I think that is true. It is narrow, rocky and has sharp drop offs and few people want to walk on it. It is hard.
Andi: I agree, when you have moments like this or other hard things you are walking through, does your husband pour into you and give you help and guidance?
Jenny: yes, he does, and he gives me the word and fights for my freedom. However, I have learned about my identity from Rachel, David taught me, I have taught others, and yet It was still a not working for me. David knows I come at it from a different level. I was always a good kid! I didn’t make bad choices. I didn’t have sex before marriage. I didn’t do drugs. I didn’t do things that upset my parents. I earned it. I was a good girl. The angle that I had to approach my identity from was, HUMBLE YOURSELF SINNER! So, where Jesus taught me my identity, it wasn’t Rachel or David or Chris, Jesus taught me from Romans 9:11
Though they were not yet born and had nothing either good or bad- in order that God’s purpose of election might continue, not because of works but because of him who calls.
So, basically before anything, before they had done good or bad, God had elected them to chosen for part of this story. I have tried to explain this to people and I have yet to explain it good. I know my righteousness is filthy rags! They people around me have seen me struggle with identity and tried to help me, but ultimately it was Jesus that taught me.
Andi: So, the question was, how does David help you… and your answer is he doesn’t.
Jenny: (Hysterical Laughing) No, he does help me with things all the time and he walk me through things. Just not identity.
Andi: What is the biggest myth about 1st generation disciple makers.
Jenny: That we have our lives more together than anyone else. We are hot messes too.
Andi: What do you think are the dangers of putting Disciple makers on a pedestal?
Jenny: Well, it is a little interesting isn’t it. What we do is, follow me as I follow Jesus. I am going to endeavor to lay my life out as something for you to imitate. So, there is some of that, that we do. But! Those people that I am in covenant with know and see all the sin that I reveal to them when we meet in my living room. There is not a pedestal in my living room because they see the way I am and the words I say and watch me get on my knees and repent in front of them. So, you are setting people up for failure or disappointment because when you put someone on a pedestal , they will fall and fail you. Jesus is the only one that can be on that pedestal. This is what the Lord says, “ Have mercy on me, O’ God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my inequity, and cleanse me from my sin! For I know my transgressions and my sin is ever before me. -Psalm 51:1-3
That’s for me, that’s for you, that’s for our first gen group, that’s for Chris Moix, that’s for all of us.
About a week ago I called David (Jenny’s husband) and asked him a couple questions and I think this is one of my favorite things to do. In a world where people are so ready to complain about their spouse, I choose to be around people who choose to biblically love and respect their spouse. I asked David, “How has discipleship changed Jenny? How has Jenny having been discipled and now making Disciples changed your marriage? And is there anything anyone NEEDS to know about your wife?” David finally called me this past Friday to give me his answer. He tried to clear his throat, but I could almost hear the weight behind his voice as he began his answer. This told me that he meant every word that he was about to say. That the words he was about to say about his wife had stirred his soul.
“Jenny didn’t play sports as a kid. She was never really part of a team. I never saw Jenny as someone who was willing to do hard things. I was a youth pastor for a while and Jenny just saw herself as a youth pastor’s wife. My job was my business and my job to figure out and she was just there to help me for services. My wife has become someone that continuously hears the voice of the Lord and chooses to do hard things for the kingdom. My wife has become someone that I am equally yoked with. She is on my team. My wife has become someone who always lays her life down for others. My wife now owns the fact that she is a minister of the Gospel. She bends to the weight of the Lord. I know that she could make Disciples without me… but couldn’t without her. She lays her life down for our family, the women she walks with and the men I walk with. She does things for my group that I can’t do for hers. I love her.” -David Brockman
Thank you all for stopping by to learn more about just one of the amazing Disciple making women that I will be interviewing over this season of rest. If you would like to reach out to Jenny you can email her at: Jenny@harrahchurch.org
Grace & Peace
Chorley
